Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Weird things have been happening.
First,there are those bizarre early morning dreams.Now,there are downright clear references.This can't all be co-incidental.And I am speaking like a freakshow.
The magazine outs tomorrow.I had the most embarrassing conversation ever.More on that,later.The job's still on.I was having doubts,but that is safe and sound.'Castle' is back on.I'd missed them both.The Beckett-Castle fights.I'm petting cats that showed up in my garage one fine day.They are adorable.Although,I have something to say to people that are cruel towards animals-PETA is not dead.So BEWARE,you sadistic-sorry-excuses-for-humans.
And that shall be all for now.
I've started studying too.Oh thank you God.
=] And I'm forgetful so I know I'm missing something crucial here,but ah well you can only remember so much.Latzah.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Ehhhm.

Hahaha.
You know that song by *Vengaboyz-Boom Boom Boom*?Well,so I went to this cafe a few hours back and the ground floor was pretty empty.There was only one other table occupied when we went in,with two 30-something aged men.So well,one among the two was quite the singer-at-heart and he would hum along joyfully with every song that played on the speakers.So when,this particular song came on,it turned out that he didn't know the lyrics,and couldn't quite keep pace with the song to understand what was being said.. not that he cared two hoots.He just went along and kept singing at regular intervals during the song - "You are my molecule". Do you buy that?He did.He really did.The other fellow was going pink all over meanwhile.Hila-freaking-rious.
Anyway.I watched POTC4 today and whoever thinks it sucked doesn't know a thing about the series.I think,after the first this probably ties it with "Dead Man's Chest" for me.There really wasn't enough 3D to revel in,though.And I was almost ready to give up on my love for all things non-sissy vampyr,when all those mermaids came floating up on Whitecap Bay.Hereby,swearing to self to read up every bit of literature I can get my hands upon,concerning merlore.
Favourite POTC4 moment #1-

[will add more when they begin to show online]
The Second Best,aye.
Captt.Jack Sparrow is the only Disney creation that I really wholeheartedly like.
And I much fancied Elizabeth Swann with Sparrow.But if not Keira,well then who better than Cruz?Because only Cruz could have played this one.Blackbeard,however,could have been much scarier.
Now,pass meh that rum,ye bloody swine.

Friday, May 20, 2011

=]

Things have been going really fast and really good.The cynic wonders what the catch is.The downside is I haven't been studying.Whatev.I still have some time.
So,well.Something weird happened.I wrote this story on a spur.I was looking to get published.Heard of Kindle?Here check it out- http://www.kindlemag.in
They had a contest on.So I took a chance with it.And I mailed them the story.
This magazine,well,lets just say their content is pretty high-standard.Critical Reflective Journalism,they insist.
And they approved my story,so I think I am getting published!Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay.Their June issue is going to have my story in it.This is definitely what I needed.Remember how I was going on about low self-esteem?Well,I guess I can count the writing part out of that now.
This was my first attempt at getting published and only my fourth ever short story.I feel lucky.And very happy.
So here's hoping that the lucky streak continues for a while.This gave me enough of a confidence boost to write my first Indivine prose post which is also my first ever contest post on IndiBlogger.Look down then.
And happy living,says the optimist.

Be-you-ty



What does real beauty mean to me?Now,I know I am going to get carried away with this.
The dusty volume of Little Oxford Dictionary that is perched on my bedside table defines beauty using four independent phrases-
1.the quality of being very pleasing to the senses
2.a beautiful woman
3.an excellent example of something
and lastly,-4.an attractive feature or advantage.
But is beauty really that objective to you?Can it be measured by the number of tick marks placed on little square boxes in a questionnaire?
Perhaps,it can.But it is not quite so for me.
Being,as I am,a teenage girl;dealing with concerns over one's own physical image is not alien to me.In fact,everyday the fashion industry doles out fresh guidelines on how to capture beauty and use it as your slave,to act as per your command.One day,they declare that being full bodied and well-fed is 'in' and is pretty,the next-they are calling it fat and ugly.Another day,wearing your hair a particular way is divine but only hours later they will deem it a 'fashion disaster'.But what they fail to understand is that,beauty is not their captive prisoner and beauty cannot be withheld.
And they are fickle in their haughty ignorance.

1.If beauty is the quality of being very pleasing to the senses then isn't love,when all your senses are famed to elope,considered by most to be the most beautiful thing in existence on Earth a contradiction?
2.A beautiful woman.
Like a 'real' man cannot be considered beautiful.He can only be handsome and dashing.
A beautiful woman in my country is firstly,anybody whose skin complexion is on the fairer side.If you're not fair you don't even deserve to enter the competition,you don't qualify.
How can a person's skin colour correspond to their beauty?Can't dusky complexioned people be beautiful too?What about Tyra Banks and Naomi Campbell?No,not in my country where fairness products are still one of the hottest selling items in the market.
Fairness is a prerogative for beauty here.
3.An excellent example of something must also be the perfect example for the thing.But isn't perfection overrated?In our quest for perfection don't we often forget the series of little imperfections that we manipulate in order to achieve what is perfection?Aren't the imperfections more appealing altogether with their natural flaws and shortcomings?
4.Lastly,beauty is defined to be an attractive feature or advantage.And surely,the linguist who compiled this miniature dome of abhorrence that strives to analyse to analyse and account for the meaning of every single thing in existence hadn't heard of sacrifices.Yes,sacrifices the non-dictionary referring to opposite of an advantage,because when you are sacrificial you're more often than not at a disadvantage.

Sacrifices,that are sometimes necessary and always crucial in influencing and revealing the dynamics of a person's character i.e. his or her inner beauty.Also,if all of us were attracted to the same things,then what fun would that be?
I think what I am trying to say is that real beauty cannot be defined.It cannot be contained within the constraints of a few words.It is not a helpless victim to time,it is ageless.Wrinkles cannot make it fade or a few extra kilos here and there.And it does not have a colour,a height,a hairstyle.Real beauty is everywhere.It is all in the mind and whether you choose to see it.So good luck finding it!


Note-None of these pictures are mine,of course.
I am going to give myself airs and imagine myself as a small-time writer now,so I don't completely rule out the possibility of ever writing fiction due to well,lack of self-esteem.And this feels good,did I mention?Takes away all the crap in the life.
However,you know those writer-cliches?Well,it just dawned on me last night while..you guessed it-writing!.. =P that they are not all made up.Dreams are all a writer really has,isn't it?They are all.Scary.
-_-

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

I have started work..I think.It feels like a sham.And pays peanuts.But WTH.Yaaaaaay!! =)
It is lucrative.So kiss my ass already. :3
PS.Yes.It involves writing.What did you think? o.O

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Dear IndiBlogger,

You make me want to sucker-punch you.
Pull your big-girl pants on,suck it up and fix yourself up ALREADY.
Geexsh.Drama Queen. =/
Relationships are all about convenience in our day and age.Aren't they?
Thank God,I was able to get my head out of the clouds in enough time to realise that this early.
-_- Happy Convenience-ship to you.

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Well Well



^Much love to The Brothers Macabre for pretty much single-handedly introducing and popularising the horror genre to Bollywood.You guys rock.
And.Well.Um.
Heard of the Demon's Hour?-_- My house is well above 150 years and well,lets just say,its pretty animated around that time.
I'm not really a believer or a non-believer.But well,things get a little creepy after a while,when certain things become routine.

Thursday, May 12, 2011

I'd like it to rain

Monsoon's pretty early this year.Its been raining off and on almost every week now.And I still haven't tired myself of the rain yet.Somehow I just want it to rain and rain and rain and flood,maybe.But that would mean being stuck at home,which would pretty much suck.Also,I'm not really all that sadistic.So I wouldn't want to be responsible for all the homeless people that would die[maybe] if that happened.Its like that Raghav song- "Winter in my mind".
Its irritating when you don't enjoy shoutfests and the person you live with just wants to provoke you into participating in one.I like my peace,okay?And conversation solves everything anyway.There's only so much drama I can take. -_-
So.Well.I watched this-
Because I'd wanted to for the longest time.And I felt miserable.Miserable,because just existing within the confines of mainstream society felt criminal to me,after I was done watching the movie.
Like that was enough to start seeing myself in a despicable light.
Idk.It just felt like plain shit.Y'kn.
Had the sisters over.Lunched out.Coffee'd in.Its nice to retain old friends.Who know your roots.And hold on.When it takes nothing to let go.
I am going to be reading fantasy fiction now.Since,I cannot will myself to even open any novel that requires basic thinking capabilities or that of retrospection.I will read me some Edward Cullen clone saga and deaden my brain to sleep.Because it is momentously sleep-deprived.And has my nerves playing pingpong.
The photography skills need to be brushed up.Also I need need to start studying.Majorly need to.
And I think I'm going to watch Ragini MMS in the theatres next week.Lets hope it really is a threesome.Threesomes are supposed to be fun.
Tomorrow,the election results come out.A Rightist Bengal.Shoot me somebody.Shoot me already.You'll be doing the world a favour.They will garland you.In my head.
MG did a blink-and-miss today.Which is why my post is in red.Because I am paranoid with details.And she was wearing red.That is so lame.Nevertheless.I wish we also had Soc extra classes.The nutjob upstairs knows we'll need it,soon.
And well,coming to nutjob,I found this blog-
Yes,I'm in constant search to comfort myself into feeling 'normal'.So.Read--
http://theenigmashideout.blogspot.com/ & http://infracaninophile.wordpress.com/
Its the same guy.Whatever.Toodles.I think I'll cook myself some noodles.No,for real. O.O Bye.


Err.Its probably a her.Um.Okay.Yes.That's it.
And maybe they're not the same person.I am starting to feel like a retard. -_- Whatever.Both are worth checking out.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Remember Her?


No?

Die.

Tailor-made for mass consumption.

Reject.Reject.Reject.
So.I woke up.And got on the computer.And I'm back in love with Switchfoot.More specifically, the song "Yet".Idk.Its just so soulful.
And.Um.Reading a random not-so-random blog.And just replaying and replaying the song.Because I don't want it to end.The song.Haha.
Logged into FB.What is it with bullies?Sheesh.People have different kinds of lives.Who are you to judge? -_- I could carry out a mass homicide on judgemental people,that is how much I hate them.
Anyway.Not much to say,really.So lyrics-

YET

All attempts have failed
All my heads are tails
She's got teary eyes
I've got reasons why

I'm losing ground and gaining speed
I've lost myself or most of me
I'm headed for the final precipice

But you haven't lost me yet
No, you haven't lost me yet
I'll sing until my heart caves in
No, you haven't lost me yet, yet

These day pass me by
I dream with open eyes
Nightmares haunt my days
Visions blur my nights

I'm so confused
What's true or false
What's fact or fiction after all
I feel like I'm an apparition's pet

But you haven't lost me yet
No, you haven't lost me yet
I'll run until my heart caves in
No, you haven't lost me yet

If it doesn't break, if it doesn't break, if it doesn't break
If it doesn't break your heart, it isn't love
No, if it doesn't break your heart, it's not enough
It's when you're breaking down with your insides coming out
That's when you find out what your heart is made of

And you haven't lost me yet
No, you haven't lost me yet
I'll sing until my heart caves in
No, you haven't lost me yet
'Cause you haven't lost me yet


The second and fourth stanza could be written in my "About Me".And I think its time I drew up a to-do list.Ookay.Thats it. =)
Personality Disorder Test Results
Paranoid |||||||||||||||| 62%
Schizoid |||||||||||||| 58%
Schizotypal |||||||||||||||||| 74%
Antisocial |||||||||||||| 58%
Borderline |||||||||||||||||||| 82%
Histrionic |||||||||||| 46%
Narcissistic |||||||||||| 50%
Avoidant |||||||||||| 50%
Dependent |||||| 30%
Obsessive-Compulsive |||||||||||| 46%
Take Free Personality Disorder Test
Personality Test by SimilarMinds.com


Surprise Surprise! ;)

Water

Downward spiral over and everything.Its time to begin work.And try to have some fun with this.And whatever school time I have left.
So ehh,the summer holidays are on.And so are the extra classes.History extra classes.
And I'm late every frikken day.Always,always arriving after the teacher,who is late herself.
And I wake up early anyway.And still,I'm late.Also,I live like 15 minutes away from school.So hah!
My classmates are probably the most ridiculously,religiously studious batch the school has seen in quite a while.I mean- 1.Almost every student that has History for a subject shows up.2.They don't just all show up,they're also in time.All of them are well settled in before the teacher arrives.3.They agree to wear the school uniform.
What is wrong with you bunch?Its our last Summer holidays in school!At least respect that and be late.You can study like robots all year.
Anyway,enough on that.I am,though,so turning up before any of the robos show up the next day.I am not usually late.I am never usually late.So,that's a touchy issue :P
Plans .. Plans .. Plans..
These can turn out to be the last plans I make with these people.So,I am going all out on extroversion and meeting everybody.And you know what?Its fun.Its always fun to not exist in select hordes.So that.
Watch movies.Go visit the riverside,take the camera out.Lunch.Coffee.And everything in between.Anything really,that spells fun.
So a gala summer beginning is on the line,of course I'll have to sober up by mid-summer and start constructing myself into one of the robots.But eh,it is XII.So worth it.
The Sleeper chapter is over.Pity pity.
And I am going to write a bit of fiction and see if I can get published.
Now,I am hungry.So later.
Summer,thy name is exhaustion.And sleep.
*Yawn*

Monday, May 9, 2011

D-Day ;)

10.What would you do after Hogwarts?
Ans:- Work as an Obliviator.







Challenge Courtesy-Tumblr

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Day Nein

9. What would a Boggart appear to you as?
That-

XOXO


Because you make me feel normal =^)

Lovesick =>.<=

I am so utterly pathetic when it comes to love.Its embarrassing.I always somehow manage to fall for the wrong people.Always,the wrong people.
I mean why can't I just have one issue-free relationship,right?Where the boy loves me and I love the boy back.But no,complications just have to crop up.
So,my teenage life till now has been a rollercoaster ride of crushes.Lets see,I've fallen for the disgustingly chauvinistic rocker,the quintessential himbo,the cousin,the friend,and a whole wide range of people in between.And there really is no connecting link that joins them together.Nothing.And now,not even their sex.
So God help me.
The worst part is,once,they start noticing me I stop noticing them.Seriously,that is not even fair to me!And hence the cycle continues without any end.
The only end is an interruption,where I am distracted by other material worries enough to take my mind off obsessing over said crush.
So I am in one of my hopeless *crushing* phases.And I always have a stupid mooning smile on my face.
It is irritating.Gah.
I have an obsessive personality.
I want an invisibility cloak.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Day 8 - amortentia

8. What would Amortentia make you smell?
Amortentia..
"Amortentia doesn't create actual love, of course. That's impossible. But it does cause a powerful infatuation or obsession."
I wish I could brew some right now.
Amortentia would make me smell the wet earth after a rainshower,it would make me smell a brewing storm itself.. the distinctive scent that is carried in the stormy wind.It would smell of books.And a lingering perfume of wild flowers mixed with everyday perspiration.Of coffee.And vanilla.Cooked cardamom seeds.Freshly shampooed hair.
Anya Marina - Whatever You Like (T.I. Cover)

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So much of Pottermania is getting to my head,think I'll maybe bring out those books and set to reading them again.

Ochre,

Radiohead-Lotus Flower

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I am feeling you today.They always feel your darker friends-blue and green,but I'm feeling you today.You're not yellow,happy or bright.You're not pink.And you're not unfeeling white.You're subtle and you're discontentment.Not unhappy,melancholy or any of those things.You're just impassive.You're apathy.Resignation.And yes,I'm feeling you today.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Day Six


What would your Patronus be?
Answered.


Yeah,I have my senti Bolly song phases- so here -
The beginning does sound like 'Fix You-Coldplay'.But then again,that song is so epic I won't even object to a second-grade rehashed version.
Jiyein Kyun_Dum Maaro Dum (2011)

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Oh.And while I am at it.The teacher who taught me for 3 years and still teaches at my school barely remembered me whereas she remembered my sister who she hasn't taught or met in over 10 years.Hmm.Really justifies my existence. =[
However,in her defence.Yes,'cheharata seriously onekta palte geche" ;D

Monday, May 2, 2011

Shattered Glass


Long Summer school days make me feel like that ^
The thought of spending hours cooped up inside a brickwalled room with a bunch of other people,not necessarily pleasant people makes me mentally scream out in frustration.Add to that,in summer,they're all just bodies that sweat and emit even more heat.And lets not even take into consideration the noise.
The only saving grace is atleast it is sans boys.Add those imbeciles to the equation and you have a furnace.
-_-
People talking in paradoxes.The same faces everyday.
I guess I've been programmed to embrace change or something.If only I could see different faces everyday.What I wouldn't give for that.